results
disappointed bout my results esp 4 e 2 subjects i was expecting to do better for...tink i might do ok for chem but we'll jus haf to wait and see dun we...ah well kinda jaded dun reali care anymore, which is kinda dangerous @ tis pt, constantly being reminded tat i haf bout 2mths+ to prelims, e fact alwaes chills my heart but it seems tat i need to recover b4 i can get gng again...
life is so routine, no spontainity bout it (wrong spellin? arh wtf) sch home sch home sch home sch home den wkends go do somethin fun to 4get things and den guess wat, its routine again...seriously i tink i'm a pretty anti-system person, i need suprises, i need to enjoy myself...i dun mind sch dun get me wrong, i love meetin new pple n stuff, i enjoy learnin bout new things, they fascinate me, but its so tiring to face e pressure, not onli bout exams academic but also image superficiality [i suck @ spellin by e way] can't i jus do wat i wanna do and be happy...yeah i noe without pressure pple will neva excel yadda yadda yadda shit...sorree man i'm jus so tired...i yearn for a holiday, an actual holiday, not one where in e back of ur mind u haf to keep tinkin bout e exams tat r loomin...
am i veri screwed up?
i failed as a daughter becoz my parents dun noe who i reali am and i dun intend to let dem noe anytime soon
i failed as a sister becoz i find myself growin more and more detached from her and leavin her in whateva shit she's gotten herself into
i failed as a member of e house i live in becoz my temper keeps gettin e better of me
i failed as a friend becoz i seem to keep puttin myself first
i failed as a gurlfren becoz i can't take u away from ur suffering
i failed as a person becoz of fear
ahh dun worry bout me...rise from e ashes i must
*OUT*
aLiSoN
